Saturday, September 17, 2011

Subject: Mistakes in Asking a Girl Out



Sorry for the late post, it’s been a rough week; one of my phones is broken, lost in a tournament then lost my girlfriend. This is one super bad month
for me and I hope it stops there. Anyway here’s another exciting post that will surely help my fellow men.

Do you have a crush? Or that girl who is the apple of your eye? Then what are you waiting for go and ask her out. If you’ve already built attraction, then you don’t need the perfect line or approach. You just need to avoid these common mistakes that men make when asking girls out.

1)      Submissiveness
Well for a start I don’t really care what you’ve hear or read—women like men to ACT LIKE men. You can give romance and seduce without being a sore loser. And you can certainly be thoughtful without bending to her every whim.

If you haven’t called a woman out on her bullshit at least once in the courting process, you’re probably doing something wrong.

To be honest I’m not saying that you should be confrontational and aggressive with women. Trust me they don’t like that. What they like is a quiet, firm resolve. No woman will ever respect any man who isn’t willing to occasionally put his foot down on her crap.

Woman exam. Women push boundaries. It’s what they do. If you’re not signaling early on that certain things don’t fly with you, then you’re going to get tagged as a submissive weenie and likely she’ll say no to you when you ask her out on a date.

2)      Overeagerness
Submissiveness and being overeager often walk hand in hand. Both stem from a lack of confidence.

Every time you start flirting with a woman, your FIRST goal should be to make sure she understands that you’re attracted to her. Your second goal should be to make sure she knows that you’re not so crazy about her as to be losing sleep over it.

One of the good rule of thumb is to never ask her for anything twice. Let’s say you ask a woman you’re into if she wants to meet up later at a bar. If she opts out for whatever reason, then you don’t ask again. Otherwise, you look like you’re begging and wheedling for that date. Instead just drop it and don’t mention it again.

3)      Being Vague
Now if you ask a girl out, then you must make sure she understands that it’s a date. This is crucial. In fact, it’s so important that I always counsel guys to say the word DATE when they ask her out so that there’s no confusion.

Why does this matter so much?
Because without communicating this intention, you encourage women who are too “NICE” to say no to go out with you anyway and pretend it’s just a friendly night out.

This shit happens all the time because guys want to hedge their bets and not take a direct ego hit by being told no. So what they do is play all these cutsie games that hide their intentions, hoping to reveal that “POOF! it really is a Date!” after the girl they like agrees to go out with them.

One of the most common ways guys to this is to ask a girl to “hang out” with a group of friends. This just muddies the waters and increases the chances that you’ll get strung along, stuck in the friend zone and unable to get out.

Listen, I know that facing possible rejection is hard, but you need to be direct with women. They must know from the very beginning that you’re looking for more than friendship. Let them make their decision based on the truth and you’ll fare much better in a long run.

Hope this little blog entry will help you guys out. Next blog I will be posting will be a field report or a personal diary. Thanks!