My Dearest Kai,
You brought tears
to my eyes… I am so thankful that I have you in my life, and the fact that my
true friends are very few does not upset me AT ALL, for I have you, and having
YOU makes me content and pleased… I am very much honored to be the well of your
secrets; this means the world to me. And I want you to know that your secrets
are NEVER a burden on me
Our
friendship is a miracle itself. A bless. A strength that enables us to go on
along this bumpy road knowing things will be just fine, because at the end of
the day, we know we each have someone who cares about us no matter what
happens… or what wrong we may do
It
is such a wonder how when it comes to us, we treat each other differently, I
have never managed to treat other friends the way I treat you! I have never
managed to accept their faults, nor bare with some qualities of theirs which
contradict to my own. We should not be harsh on people nor judgmental, but I am
ashamed to say I have not achieved this with some people, and proud to know I
can never judge you, nor feel agitated about anything you do or say.. Isn’t it
a wonder? Kai, knowing there is someone in this world I feel this way about
lets me realize I have been given a gift millions have never dreamed of
obtaining…
I am thankful, for
your friendship, for your sisterhood, for the bond that back at some point in
our life was about to break, but thanks to you, to your insistence, your
patience, God not only mended this relationship, but made it one of the rarest
in this world… every time I look back at those days, I remember how bad I felt,
how lonely, how tears were not only warm and bitter, but brutally stabbing my
foolish heart… I Thank God, that these days have passed by bringing along
brighter memories. I am glad I did not leave the chance I had to go waste… for
I would have ended up suffering my entire life
Many
people, when they love someone truly, they keep on telling them how they will
do anything in the world for their sake, it may sound to some as a scene in a
movie or a chapter in a novel, it did seem so for me at some stage, but those
who witness true love, understand well that these are not only some mere words
that are being said and then forgotten.. it is a promise that we make without a
slight thought, a swear we practice not in front of a court judge, but in front
of God the judge of all, not because we have to, but because it pleasures our
souls to do so for those who matter the most to us….
Sometimes
I joke around with my family, telling them that when I die, they are not
allowed to enjoy my belongings! lol instead, my blog for example will go to my
friend, even if she has no idea about it!… for I am sure, the ones she haven’t
read yet, she would read them from the ones that used to belong to me… but then
again, we will not need to inherit each other Kai, I strongly believe that God
will grant us the wish we want more than anything in this world, the prayer I
never forget to say, the need I always plead for when I pray to God, the relief
that I strongly desire no matter how greedy it may sound… you know dear Kai that
I cannot go on without you, nor leave without you…..
These
days, saying DON’T GO seems to be stuck in my throat, I keep on reminding
myself that I cannot be selfish! I shouldn’t be! Saying it would immediately
make me choke with tears….
But
don’t go, and break this fragile heart….. But break it, only if it would help
mend yours, and I mean it from the deepest point in my heart.
I’m sorry for the
trouble I made these past days for my emotions are trying to burst out. You
mean a lot to me and I don’t meant anything that would harm you at all. All I wanted
is for us to be happy for this is something that you and I can only make.
I pray for strength
and perseverance for me to make this relationship better, we may not have it
now but someday, somehow this friendship will find its way a home.
John.
